What's the opposite of "riot"?

This kind of mob-insanity kinda scares the crap out of me.

That people can get so swept up in freaking out that they destroy a part of a city.
How does that happen!? Why does that happen!? (But really, it’s no worse than paid-for-by-the-government wars, though is it?)

Maybe it’s because of the amount of forced control they feel over their lives.
Maybe the rioters were trying to overtly take back some of their freedom, maybe they were driven to do it.

They may have reacted in an unnecessarily violent way… but I’m guessing, it’s societal and personal pressures, mixed with the lack of control exercised over their own lives and their lack of true, ultimate, joyful freedom that could be the significant causes to such mob lash-outs. A few people react in ways that look and feel just like real freedom and self-control, and that leads other people wanting in on that pseudo-freedom wave.

Who the heck doesn’t want to feel like they are in control and have full freedom? I know I do- all of the time! But I’m not going to burn a car over it.

Or would I? *cue slight paranoia over the state of the human mind*

How does mob-mentality work, exactly? I remember discussing it in Psych classes, but I never really dove into the workings of it. (This is where I make a note to go back to my psych book—and yes, I still have it!)

Let me see what google has to say…

On the website, wisegeek.com it says: Social psychologists who study group behavior tend to prefer terms like “herd behavior” or “crowd hysteria.”

Yeah. Not really the depth I was hoping to quickly stumble upon (and because I told myself I was going to write tonight, I’m not going to get into researching it just yet, but maybe I’ll do another post like that later).

I’m sure we all know what mob-mentality is… but do we know what it IS?? The root and cause of it? Why it happens?

Brings me to questions and paranoia’s like: Do only people who are similar in personality, or intellect, or blood alcohol level, or some other factor, react together in a mob? Or should unsuspecting people be wary of getting swept up, as if in a spontaneous tornado? Like, what if I had been on that street at that moment, might I have ended up smashing out a window or kicking a puppy or something?

(Not sure why my mind is comparing a riot in the streets of Vancouver to a mud slide in a rain forest (do mud slides even happen in the rain forests? OH there are SO many things in this world that I just don’t know for sure! Can we ever know it all!?))

And to completely contrast everything I just wrote:

I guess mob mentality offers a subtle, promising hope. If a mob of people can get so railed up over something like losing a hockey game, maybe mobs of people can spark spontaneous bursts of joyful evolutions over the streets of the world!

It shows that people really do have the potential to group together as one and completely change and take over a section of the world.

Can we create a mob-evolution? One where we over-throw all the things that don’t seem to “work” in society? Can we group together enough people working on their personal evolution to make everyone else on the street work on their own?

And instead of burning cars and robbing electronics, we plant vegetables and trees and use no cancer-causing chemicals!

It will take everyone together to create a world beautiful for everyone; natural, sustainable, full of love and animals!

Yes. I am a utopian. (but take that lightly… remember I don’t know what causes mob-mentality or if they have mud slides in rain forests, do you think I know the complete definition of a “utopian”? ;)

You Are What You Think, Especially if It’s Ugly You’re Thinking.

I know it’s best to not think about the past. But there are times when it’s useful to go back there, to try and find out a little about how my mind is working now and to make sure I align my mind with the present moment, to be sure it’s not merely running from a subconscious, false belief.

All this thinking was brought on by finding old pictures of me that I dislike looking at. I was 18, in Niagara Falls with my family and I was so unconscious it was scary. (So unconscious, in fact, that I had my hair slicked back in a self-loathing pony tail with two pieces of “bangs” hauled out on either side, which resembled a handle-bar moustache…. placed on my head. Yeah. I hadn’t a clue!)

I hated myself and my life back then; and I hated how I looked, I hated people, I hated how lost and confused I was. I was dorky and ugly with not one ounce of Self developed. I had no idea who or what I was, I was alone in my internal self-war.

Back then, I was living in the past everyday. Going back to things bullies said to me years and years before, and what felt like every day after. I believed everything they said because I didn’t have a sense of who I was or what I could be. I sat desperately alone inside my self-loathing for the entirety of my teenage life. Spent much time and energy in seeing all my faults and believing all the crap people said about me, instead of building who I was and creating who I would be. (I was also very dumb ;)

An older boy I knew back then said to me a few times: you are going to be beautiful…when you’re older. This reconfirmed my notion that I was indeed ugly at the time, but it also planted a seed inside me. I’m not sure if he planned it that way, in hopes of saving my deteriorating appearance, or if he saw beauty in me that I hadn’t yet. Whatever way he meant it, it planted that seed, one that made me start looking for beauty inside myself.

Though because I was 16-18 when I heard that, I figured: I have a LONG way to go before I’m “older” (I'm there now, 30 is the beginning of "older" haha). So, it wasn’t until I was about 23-24 that I started to see some kind of beauty poking through, which correlates well to when I started hearing it from other people a little more (when I would hear someone tell me I was “beautiful” before those ages I would scoff at the lies they were trying to convince me of.) But during my mid-twenties, I started to pause, and Thank someone who would say that (instead of accusing them of being senile liars.)

I didn’t always completely believe them (even still, I have moments of doubt). But thanking people, instead of dismissing them, was my first step in becoming beautiful, like the boy from my past said I would be.

I hear it all the time from people now, that I’m gorgeous, beautiful, natural, etc. I still battle with my inner scowl, which tells me I’m the ugly duckling I always was, but luckily that voice is getting smaller, loosing its power. And the truth is coming forth, that all humans are beautiful.

I do see the beauty in this human form I have, I see the beauty in every human form around me.

So I’m guessing it has been my efforts to create my inner beauty that has slowly been releasing an outer beauty, and my quest to see the beauty in each and every person I see, all of which is what other people are seeing.

I always thought I would be made fun of if I spoke of being any sort of beautiful (people in my past also didn’t take well to other people being confident in any way, you would get ridiculed for “thinking too much of yourself”), therefore I always felt uncomfortable telling myself I am beautiful. It has only been lately that I see how important it is to tell myself that, that I am honoring, not only myself, but the Creator. And after being so negative for so many years, I feel I owe the universe some good vibes!

So, here, I’ll say it, I’ll mean it, and I’ll ignore the inner voice that’s disagreeing with me: I AM BEAUTIFUL! (And so are you ;)

One of the main problems in our society? (Canada)...

Our society hasn’t adopted the siesta!

A regulated 3-4 hour national rest time!

I’m willing to bet it’s the main reason stress levels are so high, depression is so rampant and volcanoes are erupting all over the world! (Sure, why not!?)

When I was in Southern Italy, walking the busy streets, seeing people everywhere, shops and cars and businesses all running at a steady pace, I hadn’t witnessed a siesta at that point. So, as the streets became less busy, the shops emptying, and the businesses flipping to the “close” side, I wasn’t sure what was happening!

I’m surprised my first thought wasn’t “OH CRAP, IT MUST BE A TERRORIST ATTACK!” but I don’t really think like that (and does that even happen in Italy?) and I was lost in a meditative state of joyful, exhausted, semi wine-drunk bliss- there was no sign of fear in me. In fact, I was so sedated, I’m pretty sure someone could’ve ran at me with a knife and smiling would’ve been my reaction before flinching in fear.

Then our tour guide explained it: it’s siesta time! Everyone goes home, prepares food, spends time with their families, or has some alone time, and then everyone takes a nap together! (Sounds BEAUTUFUL to me!)

My thought: WOW! How come your culture does that and ours doesn’t?! (Another reason I am convinced I have been born on the wrong continent! I totally have culture envy. Even though I love Canada- mostly.)

The tour guide continues to explain that it can get really hot during those ours of the day, so spending it at home, resting, ensures that people’s energy will be conserved. Which also ensures more productivity and positive energy for the evening, while everyone gets on with their day.
So, even though our climate doesn’t really get THAT hot... it can be annoyingly cold, even in summer months (especially Newfoundland!)- so it’s still fair and we would totally benefit from it!

I can see how it would make for a happier, more efficient society. An afternoon nap has a LOT of power!

They seem to have it figured out in Italy and the other siesta countries (Latin American countries (except Brazil), as well as in the Philippines, China, Vietnam, Bangladesh, India, Southern Italy, Greece, Croatia, Malta, the Middle East and North Africa.)

Prime time, middle of the day, you get to hang out with your loved ones, take sometime doing things for yourself, and then napping!? Awesomesauce.

Now. How to get the Canadian government to regulate this!?

Who’s with me!?!!? ;)

Random Blog Alert (home, life, parenting and personal evolution)

Sometimes I get so overwhelmed by housework I have thoughts of burning the house down and moving into a clay hut in the woods. Well, ok, everything but the “burning the house down” part… I would just give everything away and leave the house for the next poor shmuck who wants to live in such a “modern” house (and I’m not using those quotation marks loosely there! Wtf is modern anyhow? I like huts. There’s nothing wrong with a hut! (ok. Maybe it’s not perfect, but at least I wouldn’t have to do laundry… because well, if I live in a hut I might as well not wear any clothes, right? Sounds good to me. Though, my hut will need internet connection.)

NOTE TO SELF: answer my child right away when she runs to me saying “mommy look, mommy look, mommy look, mommy look” …because, note: responding on the second “mommy look” is the only other acceptable “mommy look” to respond to.

It’s rude to ignore people! -even IF they are disrupting the best sentence the world has ever seen to untangle a peace sign necklace from a piece of fence from the horse play-set. DO NOT CHOOSE TO IGNORE THE CHILD! Because by the time she gets to the 9th or 10th “mommy look” it will be rage-filled screams of urgency.

Ok. So I exaggerate sometimes.

And exaggerating may go against the “yogic” way, but it makes a more entertaining read.

See? Right there! I justified my use of exaggeration! Thereby, justifying a reason I am not fully living up to the yogic lifestyle I have been learning about for the past 9 months. (RANDOM ENLIGHTENMENT STUDIES OBSERVATION!)

At least now I am more awake to moments I do that. (Well, ok, awake to MOST of the moments I do that.)

Anyhow, after that random interruption, back to whatever it was I was saying or something completely different, I'm not entirely sure:

Attempting to work and study at home, during moments of harvesting creativity and independence in a 2 year old through alone playtime, is quite the juggling act, which, from many time to many time, leads to dropping the flaming torches, or balls or scarves, whatever one feels safer juggling. (NOTE: For anyone who isn’t a parent: even though the child is “playing alone” she is in the same room, right next to me, and I am giving her a lot of my attention, hence the reason I can usually only focus on something for a short amount of time, and why I end up writing about her interrupting me in the middle of a blog post.)

The movie “Motherhood” (Uma is AWESOME in it, btw!) totally reminded me of so many times and things in my life (some “times and things” a little more than others!)
Especially, the part about choosing to stay home with baby, while putting other types of dreams on-hold, well not really “on-hold”, so much as decreasing the amount of hours put into those dreams, and not killing myself in the process.

The millions of new tiny little things (and big humongous things!) the mind starts running with after the babies are born, takes up quite a lot of space and energy in the mind and hours in the day.
All minds are different remember, so for some people, the shift is easy, natural, smooth, and they don’t think about much else, they have the benefit of being able to comfortably not do or worry about much else. Which is great for those people!

But I am totally not one of those people.

And I would’ve been more envious of those people years ago, but yogic belief reveals the harm in it- and I can’t afford any more energy leaking!

My mind needs to process, analyze, evolve, try as many new things, and connect with as many new people, as possible! Therefore, my parenting style reflects this: lets do as much as we can together, with other people, and during our alone times. (That is a summed up version of how I’m living right now.)

Which leads me to point out one of those things in life I’m currently dealing with: the undying feeling that I could be doing more! I need to do MORE! WHY AM I NOT DOING MOOORRRREE!? Which can cause impatient feelings during my days (sometimes feeling suffocated, like a pillow firmly placed over my face (oh yes, and I am NOT exaggerating there!)

Also, this “need to do more” curse, can usually lead to a trail of unfinished projects (and dishes) and drop in confidence, but more on those defects later. ;)

Even though I am doing a lot of study and working and exploring new things, while aiming to be the best Mom I can be- I still battle with the need to DO MORE- MAKE MORE MONEY-BE MORE GODDAMIT!

Luckily, a thing about children: with a surprise hug, giggle, moment of trust or a homemade card, they snap that pillow off my face and remind me of the importance and love with which I brought them into the world and all feelings of impatience about certain things are replaced with feelings of importance of other things yet. (Yes, I tend to write very 16th century poetic sometimes. It’s a flaw readers and natural born editors will have accept about me;)

My kids are the reason I am a mother, the reason I have been able to feel love at its highest capacity. They are the reason I dedicate so much energy into evolving my own mind and life and ways of thinking about the world, in order to love them and support them as much as I can, in as many ways as possible.

Though, I still screw up and get stressed out at times. Because, they, my sweet little love forces, are also, at times, my biggest sources of stress. Which just affords more opportunities to learn and evolve! Thank you my stressful little precious children!)

Meh. I’m not perfect----yet ;)

Now, back to that darn pile of laundry.

I swear to gawd my stomach just said "yellow".

It totally did.
And it sounded like a man in one of those barbershop bands,
where they raise the next voice just a notch higher. "yellooow.. YELlooow.. YELLOOOOOOWWW.."
My belly is a soprano.

Breast cancer is annoying.

And I don’t just mean because of the pain and devastation it causes- because that part really could stop!

But these new “facebook awareness status” ploys ARE SO ANNOYING.

How in the HECK does making pseudo-sexually explicit statuses make any difference whatsoever to breast cancer awareness? Most people know about breast cancer by now, this crap isn’t helping anything.
It’s just making people look foolish, if you ask me, which you didn’t, by I’m telling you anyhow. (and I use “foolish” to tone down what typed first.)

The term “slacktivism” doesn’t accurately cover this phenomenon. This is worse than doing little. This can, in many ways, cause damage. Why all the sexual innuendo?

How about make your status something like: make healthy, positive choices and find out more about preventive measures to stop breast cancer…

OR MAYBE: donate to the breast cancer foundation… and, men, we aren’t trying to deceive you with this, we want you apart of it as well. (that’s a status sweep I could handle!)

Maybe I’ve grown into a prude, but stating where “I like” my purse and listing my shoe size as inches is NOT something I would ever be comfortable doing, nor does it tickle my funny-bone in anyway.

Why?! Just tell me why, goddamnit!

And, maybe accompanying the pretty pink ribbon, we start adding pictures to reveal true devastation of it, to maybe wake some people up to how serious this really is...

This is an early sign to look for (while also feeling for lumps):

So please, the next time you're about to get swept up in that sweep, change your status to something a little more classy and proactive maybe? Or write a blog to bitch about it? Or follow along, and know I (and other people) may be judging you a little bit ;) haha

Take care of yourself <3

(question mark ribbon found at: http://icantquitboobs.com/faq_content.html)
(the other two images found at: http://kathleengrieve.blogspot.com/2011/02/building-breast-cancer-awareness.html (who wrote a piece about awareness, that didnt include anything sexual- YOU GO GIRL!)

It’s OK to be GAY.

In order for that belief to be the norm in society, we must start referring to homosexuality as normal and acceptable, early in children’s lives.

When my first child was very young (daycare age!) someone asked her: do you have a boyfriend yet?” To which I quickly added: “or girlfriend” (and gave a supportive smile to the question asker- didn’t want to offend. And she actually said to me later, how great that was to say, that she never thought about it that way before.)

It was the first time (and not the last!) my daughter had been asked that question, so I was very happy I was quick to the draw on it. I wondered, what if she was gay!? What if she wanted a girlfriend? Wouldn’t being asked “do you have a boyfriend” make her feel she couldn’t have a girlfriend, or that there was something wrong with wanting a girlfriend? Or if she wasn’t gay, wouldn’t it make her think that having a boyfriend is more “normal and acceptable”? THAT was not the type of thinking I wanted her to develop. I want my children to be open to any possibility and accept people for their differences, and be free to choose for themselves.

So, it’s either scrap the question altogether, or get real about it… some kids are gay, don’t make them feel bad about it or make other kids judge them for it.

I also give my kids the longwinded statement: there’s: boyfriend and girlfriend, girlfriend and girlfriend, and boyfriend and boyfriend- everyone is different! :) ← never forget the smile!)

In order for the teasing in schools to stop and more acceptance to evolve, everyone needs to be asked the question that way: ‘boyfriend or girlfriend’, just so they stop for a moment, think, and are made to see the normality of the fact that it IS possible to be gay—and that it’s OK!

(photo: these are peace-rocks i tend to make whenever i go on a hike.. if you see one, let me know! ;)