The Secret of the Secret!

It takes more than just thought: you have to put work into it!

Yep. Sorry to break it to you. The bearer of bad news, I am.

When I first watched the film “The Secret” I was captivated. I was enthralled at the power of creating abundant lives for everyone in the world!

What!? Human thought can make things happen!? I can attract things in my life!?

Does everyone know this!? EVERYONE HAS TO KNOW THIS!
I wanted to football huddle the global community and shout “THREE-TWO-ONE WE GOT THIS! HUT!” (hut? Do they say that then? I digress)

But seriously, I was all: HOLY SHIT! What power!

OK! I want this-this and this and I wana go here-here and here and I want to spread this love and empower everyone in the world!

*THINK THINK THINK THINK THINK THINK THINK THINK THINK THINK*

No results.

What the--? ← was my reaction to my lack of money and travel and spreading of world peace (and I may or may not have tried to "think" those few pesky stretch marks off my ass… wouldn’t YOU like to know!)

So what was the missing link to all that think-wanting?

I mean, most of the things I “desired” were things that would help myself, my family, my friends, and thousands of other people connect and live joyfully and explore the world for all it’s wonder… “Is the secret bullshit?” I wondered. (and shouted at times of stressful events: THE SECRET IS BULLSHIT!!)

But what I didn’t know: before I am able to receive and spread all those gifts of abundance: I need to get into a place of receiving, in my mind, in my heart.

I need to dig out the blockages of what is actually hindering me from living the life I want and imagine (for if there weren’t any blockages, wouldn’t I already be living that life?)

The Secret movement is powerful. It was powerful for me. It got me to really look at what I truly wanted to attract in my life. Which is its true message. We can have all the things we want in life! We just need to decide what we want, take steps towards making it all happen, and work on ourselves to make sure we are open and ready to receive all those possibilities! (so, it’s not just hold my breath, think it and wait for Fedex to drop it all off? Boo. —though who knows, maybe some people are naturally that blockage-free and receptive!)

With the work I have been doing with Yoga and Enlightenment studies, I have begun to see the mess of blockages that are deep within my subconscious. With studying my own mind and my relation to my world around me, I see that I wasn’t in a position to receive all the things I still desire. I would’ve only scared them all away back then!

So with each day, with each meditation, with each yoga session, with each reading, with each conversation, with each stressful event: I am discovering my truth, revealing my power, and attracting all the beautiful things I can harness in this world… stay tuned, world peace coming up in about 9-12 months!

(I am glad to say, I have collected some of the beautiful things through my thinking and opening: another beautiful child to love, finding my way to yoga and meditation, meeting and connecting with more and more people, a car I love, and true love for myself ← that last thing is HUGE! (oh and a wicked vacuum, too ;) (inside joke!)

(I wanted a bird so badly when I was a child. One that would land on my head, wash my dishes and help put my clothes on, like the ones in Cinderella and Snow White... Well here's my Bella, she lands on my head, has yet to master the other talents ;)

What abundance do you want in life? And what can you do to start attracting it?

(for more information about the Secret and the Power, go here: http://thesecret.tv/)

Telling my babies to “heal” the boo-boos.

Today, the 2 year old has bitten her mouth 3 times, in the same place.
There’s a big chunk of skin that is irritating her a lot.
I told her to say, “heal mouth, please” (and she says it in the cutest way!)
I can tell by how she holds her cheek every so sweetly that she understands what I’m telling her, that she already understands the power of communicating with her body.
I tell her: tell your body to heal and go to sleep and sleep all night and when you wake, it will be all better, the pain will be all gone.

She delights in this possibility and runs to her bed and cuddles her blanket to her chin, she reaches out for kisses and hugs, and as I walk away I hear her softly say: “heal mouff, p'ease”.

This makes me smile on every level possible. (And I cant wait to find out what she thinks and feels in the morning!)

She believes.

I’ve learned a lot about the bodies healing ability this past year.
I’ve been going on and on about “healing meditation” and how darn easy it is!
And I would never go on and on about something that I didn’t first test on myself, successfully.

I had back pain for most of my life, as well as knee and hip pain.
But now, since learning the healing meditation technique, I haven’t had many issues with either!
And if I do, I quickly do a meditation on it and it vanishes, either instantly or the next day (some serious pains require a deeper meditation before bed- some may even take a few days.)

I want my children to be aware of this power, harness it as early as possible. I want them to know that the body, as well as its self-regulated functions, also takes instruction from the mind, we can speed up the healing process by believing we can! (You must fully believe!)

I tell my 10 year old about it all the time, she’s does it whenever she’s hurting.
Now that my 2 year old understands, I will remind her during every pain she has as well.

It's empowering to feel your power!

How I “Combat” Depression…

The place I started was removing the idea of “combat” or “fight” or anything that will add defense and resistance.

Years ago, I would start out with the idea of fighting it… I’d threaten it: SCREW YOU DEPSRESSION I WILL FIGHT YOU TO THE DEATH (Its or mine? I could never tell.)

Even more years ago, I would hide the fact (ok, completely deny the fact…) that I was depressed.

Me?

Depressed?

NoooOOOOOooo!!!!....................... yes I was.

I tried so hard to pretend to be “normal” (whatever that is!) Act as if feeling like killing myself is a normal occurrence in everyone’s life and being angry at the state of my world was my “thing” … that it didn’t mean that I was depressed, I was just edgy! (pfft!)

Then one year I finally gave in and admitted there might be a problem. (I had a daughter, I needed to get out of bed and stop crying!)

My next question was: what the heck now?

For the first week or 4 I cried.

I cried and cried and cried.

I felt (almost-but not quite) every ounce of pain and despair that I had bottled up over the years.
I gave in to the tugging of my depression. Let it consume me. Went into it.

And soon enough, my tears were dried up… but I was still sniffling.
I sniffled my way to a doctor I didn’t know and sat as a lump on his chair and stated: I think there is something wrong with me.

The typical list of questions ensued and my answers poured out.

The honesty, which I had been hiding from any one and every one, started driveling out in snot and tears and gasps for air to this Doctor who had never seen me before.

He smiled (?) and decided I was depressed and had “Generalized Anxiety Disorder” (in other words: I was freaking out about everything and had no sense of who I was!)

He prescribed me pills. At first I was reluctant. I didn’t want that. I wanted someone to talk to, who would fix my thoughts.

I asked him could he refer me to a psychologist. He kinda brushed his hand and said the pills should be enough, but I could talk to Dr. So and So when he gives me the prescription, if I wanted.

Ok, I sobbed. I felt a little excited to be able to FINALLY talk about all the pain I had been carrying.

The next day I went to Dr. So and So and quickly felt uneasy when I walked in the door.

The environment was old and outdated and not welcoming (not a place that cared about my pain AT ALL!) There were people just handing him paper and he’d give them pills in return.

No one was talking.

My thoughts: WTF!?

I finally saw a real-life pill pusher! Sketched-out, lost people were lined up, not wanting to talk, waiting for refills.

THIS was NOT for me. But I took my pills and left. I decided to take it in to my own hands for a while. Just pills. Lets see if they work.

I was on them for 3 months, 3 long, shaky months. At first I thought they were working, but I began to realize I was just numb.

I went to talk to two other psychologists, both of which felt much too sterile and stuffy for me. I did not feel comfortable so I didn’t talk and didn’t go back.

I decided that pills were not helping and I didn’t want to be pumping myself full of the crap. So I stopped them. No easing off. Just stopped. By the end of the first day I had to call my mom to come take my daughter. She had her for almost a week. I lay in the fetal position and cried and didn’t eat and smoked and shook. (I gave up smoking after this ,too!) It was one heck of a week!

When I finally got back to a normal I could handle, my daughter came home, and I started reading. And sadly, starting using my friends as psychologists. I would talk and talk about all the pain, all the suffering, and all my analysis of myself, my life.

That got old. And didn’t help as much as I was hoping (and I’d say it annoyed the shit out of the people in my life at the time.)

The reading helped, and I read a LOT. But it still wasn’t enough. For the next couple of years I started hunting for someone or something that I could release to. Searching obsessively for someone I could feel comfortable and safe with.

My first year of university I got excited about one of the schools psychologists I had met during an exam, he was babysitting us. He seemed so nice, so real, funny and he looked like he cared! I was excited. But sadly, it was a university, with thousands of stressed out students needing advice and listening to, he was much too booked up and I needed much more time than once every two weeks- MUCH more (...a lot of pain in there!) My hunt continued.

It took a long time. Luckily I was dealing quite well with the ups and downs of depression. I was a little bit more aware of it and all the readings were giving me tools to use when it hit, so it wasn’t as devastating as it used to be.

It was only one year ago that I found a true outlet. A place lead by a wonderfully receptive, supportive, and caring woman, Meranda Squires.

She ran the YES program (Yoga Enlightenment Studies). It was through the inner work and the sharing with her and the others in the group that I went deep into the roots of my depression and deep into all the reading I had done and finally got in touch in ways I had been searching for.

A place where I felt safe to share, to open up and to love myself. It helped me be honest with myself and others. That when I am feeling depressed, I’m not going to hide it and act as if I am a super hero. I’m going to go into it. I’m going to cry when I need to cry and I’m going to tell people that I’m crying and know it’s ok.
Being open about the truth of it all might help other people be open about their own pain and discomfort.

However, the YES program has ended for this year. And after going so deep into so many things, apart of me feels like I’ve picked old scabs and they are still bleeding from the edges now.

This time, this last month, when depression hit, I went into it.

I went in deeper than I have in years. I am missing my YES weekends, if I had a YES weekend this month I could've released so much of it there. But I don’t. I can’t. So I released it by driving for 6 hours on the highway, at night, in a rainstorm and fog, with moose crossing signs, a million transport trucks AND I was texting- without a seat belt on! And I didn’t die. (This proves to me that we die when we are ready to die, circumstances aren’t always the cause.) I felt a sense of risk, which helped. I felt a sense of being in the moment, in control- which also helped. I felt a sense of love for my family and pets sweep into my heart and dry up some of those tears. I meditated. I wasn’t scared and I cried and I stopped crying. And the next day, I felt much better, tired, but much better.

This September I start Yoga Teacher Training at the Lotus center. I’m excited. I think this will be a beautiful way to connect with my inner self and become more centered and better equip to deal with depression when it hits (and much less dangerous than late night highway driving!) I know yoga will help, it helps me now and I hardly have a clue what I’m doing yet!
It will also help me help other people, which is apart of my life's purpose (which I discovered with truth during YES).

I’ll end by quoting a family member: depression is not a choice, and we have no say in when it comes and goes, all we can do is cope with it while its here.♥

Truer words were probably spoken, but these are pretty true as well ;)

I also have a (newly formed!) green thumb!!

Check out the start of my new passion-- growing things!

I have always loved plants and had futuristic dreams of being able to not kill my own garden-y things and actually grow things to eat! (There was a time when I thought: growing food to eat only happened on big farms and by supper market suppliers--not in my own house or backyard!)

I have always wanted to grow my own food, and after doing the Yoga Enlightenment Studies program last year, which taught me about the importance and the power in growing our own foods on our own lands, I decided to get at it, more seriously, once and for all! (I already had my apple, pear and pomegranate trees started before I started the YES program, it just strengthened my passion!) I hope to have enough land someday to grow miles (and greenhouses full) of food and flowers!

For now, I will start in my kitchen (while waiting patiently for my love to build me a greenhouse this week (right!? this week!? ;)

Here is a table full of things:

There are lots of different things here: 2 tomato plants, a hot pepper plant, 10 or so cucumber sprouts, rattle snake beans, carrots, an apple tree & a pear tree (both grown from seeds from an apple and a pear I ate!) and a couple of flowers and plants (not good with their names! lol Though, one is a 3-leaf clover!).

And here is my pomegranate tree (also grown from a pomegranate i ate!) (And I'm certain this must be the 1st pomegranate tree in Newfoundland, if someone else knows of one, please let me know! :)

(much taller than a gatoraide bottle...the bottle is a little bit out of scale because it's further up the table, but you get an idea!)

The following pic is a plant we bought that pretty near died after I re-planted it in a larger pot (it only has little roots, so it dehydrated in the soil, unable to reach its water! i felt bad.. poor lil thing!) BUT! With high hopes of saving it, I repotted it in a smaller pot (while expressing much love and hope for it while doing so!)

And here it is! The last elder of the bunch (hung-over from exhaustion of trying to stay alive for so long!) & the 1st little newborn sprouting up to show me: its LIFE WILL GO ON!)
(I swear, seeing these 2 teeny-little leaves poking through the soil today sprung forth emotions resembling the ones that I experienced by frist seeing my two newborn daughters faces... it was that: "OH MY BABY! IM SO GLAD YOU ARE HERE!" feeling... ;)

I love growing things! I cant wait to eat the ones we can eat (the ones that actually grow things edible!)

This is only the beginning... <3

You Are What You Think, Especially if It’s Ugly You’re Thinking.

I know it’s best to not think about the past. But there are times when it’s useful to go back there, to try and find out a little about how my mind is working now and to make sure I align my mind with the present moment, to be sure it’s not merely running from a subconscious, false belief.

All this thinking was brought on by finding old pictures of me that I dislike looking at. I was 18, in Niagara Falls with my family and I was so unconscious it was scary. (So unconscious, in fact, that I had my hair slicked back in a self-loathing pony tail with two pieces of “bangs” hauled out on either side, which resembled a handle-bar moustache…. placed on my head. Yeah. I hadn’t a clue!)

I hated myself and my life back then; and I hated how I looked, I hated people, I hated how lost and confused I was. I was dorky and ugly with not one ounce of Self developed. I had no idea who or what I was, I was alone in my internal self-war.

Back then, I was living in the past everyday. Going back to things bullies said to me years and years before, and what felt like every day after. I believed everything they said because I didn’t have a sense of who I was or what I could be. I sat desperately alone inside my self-loathing for the entirety of my teenage life. Spent much time and energy in seeing all my faults and believing all the crap people said about me, instead of building who I was and creating who I would be. (I was also very dumb ;)

An older boy I knew back then said to me a few times: you are going to be beautiful…when you’re older. This reconfirmed my notion that I was indeed ugly at the time, but it also planted a seed inside me. I’m not sure if he planned it that way, in hopes of saving my deteriorating appearance, or if he saw beauty in me that I hadn’t yet. Whatever way he meant it, it planted that seed, one that made me start looking for beauty inside myself.

Though because I was 16-18 when I heard that, I figured: I have a LONG way to go before I’m “older” (I'm there now, 30 is the beginning of "older" haha). So, it wasn’t until I was about 23-24 that I started to see some kind of beauty poking through, which correlates well to when I started hearing it from other people a little more (when I would hear someone tell me I was “beautiful” before those ages I would scoff at the lies they were trying to convince me of.) But during my mid-twenties, I started to pause, and Thank someone who would say that (instead of accusing them of being senile liars.)

I didn’t always completely believe them (even still, I have moments of doubt). But thanking people, instead of dismissing them, was my first step in becoming beautiful, like the boy from my past said I would be.

I hear it all the time from people now, that I’m gorgeous, beautiful, natural, etc. I still battle with my inner scowl, which tells me I’m the ugly duckling I always was, but luckily that voice is getting smaller, loosing its power. And the truth is coming forth, that all humans are beautiful.

I do see the beauty in this human form I have, I see the beauty in every human form around me.

So I’m guessing it has been my efforts to create my inner beauty that has slowly been releasing an outer beauty, and my quest to see the beauty in each and every person I see, all of which is what other people are seeing.

I always thought I would be made fun of if I spoke of being any sort of beautiful (people in my past also didn’t take well to other people being confident in any way, you would get ridiculed for “thinking too much of yourself”), therefore I always felt uncomfortable telling myself I am beautiful. It has only been lately that I see how important it is to tell myself that, that I am honoring, not only myself, but the Creator. And after being so negative for so many years, I feel I owe the universe some good vibes!

So, here, I’ll say it, I’ll mean it, and I’ll ignore the inner voice that’s disagreeing with me: I AM BEAUTIFUL! (And so are you ;)

It’s OK to be GAY.

In order for that belief to be the norm in society, we must start referring to homosexuality as normal and acceptable, early in children’s lives.

When my first child was very young (daycare age!) someone asked her: do you have a boyfriend yet?” To which I quickly added: “or girlfriend” (and gave a supportive smile to the question asker- didn’t want to offend. And she actually said to me later, how great that was to say, that she never thought about it that way before.)

It was the first time (and not the last!) my daughter had been asked that question, so I was very happy I was quick to the draw on it. I wondered, what if she was gay!? What if she wanted a girlfriend? Wouldn’t being asked “do you have a boyfriend” make her feel she couldn’t have a girlfriend, or that there was something wrong with wanting a girlfriend? Or if she wasn’t gay, wouldn’t it make her think that having a boyfriend is more “normal and acceptable”? THAT was not the type of thinking I wanted her to develop. I want my children to be open to any possibility and accept people for their differences, and be free to choose for themselves.

So, it’s either scrap the question altogether, or get real about it… some kids are gay, don’t make them feel bad about it or make other kids judge them for it.

I also give my kids the longwinded statement: there’s: boyfriend and girlfriend, girlfriend and girlfriend, and boyfriend and boyfriend- everyone is different! :) ← never forget the smile!)

In order for the teasing in schools to stop and more acceptance to evolve, everyone needs to be asked the question that way: ‘boyfriend or girlfriend’, just so they stop for a moment, think, and are made to see the normality of the fact that it IS possible to be gay—and that it’s OK!

(photo: these are peace-rocks i tend to make whenever i go on a hike.. if you see one, let me know! ;)

What has our society done to breastfeeding?

Better yet: what has our society done to the female mind!?

I believe, the societal thought surrounding breasts is so perverted that some women struggle with the idea of breastfeeding. Women’s breasts have been THAT over-sexualized in the media (and by other people!) that, to a lot of women, their true function seems foreign, unnatural and “rotten” (according to a woman that used to be on my facebook.)

How can someone refer to feeding a baby, the way it was intended, as “rotten”? Would this same mother be terrified to change a poopie diaper? Baby poop (especially bottle-fed baby poop!) is much more “rotten” than an infant suckling a breast for nourishment.

I just don’t get it.

(babys first breastfeeding moment, my second baby.)

I was 19 when I had my first baby (I planned and prayed for 5 months for her!). Right from the start of wanting a baby I knew I was going to breastfeed, because well, really, I was in-tune with the natural life force of my body, it was the most natural thing to do.

I was lucky that I had an aunt who breastfed her baby.

I was around 10 when I walked in the living room and saw a babies face reaching toward her breast. (I can still see it in my mind after all these years, this kind of transcendental moment sticks with me!) It was the first time I had ever seen breastfeeding. I don’t even know if I hadeven heard of it before that moment! I was mystified. I was overflowing with love and joy at this new, delicate sight before me (as I turned my head away real fast, because I didn’t want her to think I was weird for wanting to stare (again, due to societies pressures and effects!)
It was at that moment I finally realized the point of boobs. That they weren’t just proof that God was a perverted old man who violated women’s bodies by putting those multi-sized bags of fun on the front end of us—they actually served a purpose! A beautiful, once-in-a-life-time purpose!

I couldn’t wait to have a baby to breastfeed.

Breastfeeding is as natural as the heart pumping blood. It’s a bodily function. The same mentality that would crack up laughing at multiple fart jokes reminds me of the mentality that makes fun of and is uncomfortable about breastfeeding.
Breastfeeding is the human thing to do! Our bodies do a lot of strange things, a lot of things that could be considered ‘disgusting’.

For example: breastfeeding is as natural as, and much more beautiful than, puking up your guts. And I get that some people don’t enjoy puking and wouldn’t choose to do it 5-10 times a day everyday for a year or more, but there is a purpose in puking—it saves our lives! Therefore we should do it!

Thank you Creator, for giving us the beautiful functions of purging and breastfeeding!

Breastfeeding can have moments of discomfort, like many bodily functions. But that’s no reason to write it off and never do it.

It is truly a joy, once you get passed the week-long nipple burning/stinging hump, when the sight of a towel is threatening and you have to bite your knuckles or punch yourself in the face when the baby latches. (I wonder, does every mother endure that part? or just some?)
However, after that week, that scary painful week, it is amazing! Natural! Relaxing! And full of loving bonding moments! (and "what doesn't kill you makes you stronger"? After that week, your skin pretty much turns to cast iron, strong-GER!)
(NOTE: there will probably be more random, overwhelming moments throughout the duration of your breastfeeding career— don’t feel bad for wishing you could rip your boobs off just once! Just once!! To give to dad, or someone else, to fed… or you could just pump a bottle ;)

But breastfeeding is easy! It’s sooo easy! There’s no way I could manage doing laundry while safely bottle-feeding! But strap my baby in a snuggly- front on- and I have two free hands to sort the clothes!

(----> dont lemme hear you say breastfeeding limits you! This is me and my 2nd daughter breastfeeding during a 4 hour a hike! ;)



It’s also much cheaper than bottle feeding (provided you spend money on ensuring you are eating healthy, which also benefits YOU and BABY! Two for one babeee!)

It also includes all the necessary health factors for baby and for mom. (Reducing risk of breast cancer, ovarian cancer and a truckload of other benefits!)

Also, if you are concerned with getting rid of the extra baby tub you’ve gathered over the last 9 months (or the tub you’ve had most of your life!) then breastfeeding is better than spending 5 hours at a gym EVERYDAY. It burns about an extra 500 cals… minimum-to-no exercise required!

If you are pregnant, or plan to be someday, I suggest you educate yourself on the topic, instead of shying away thinking it's not for you. Read things, watch things, and try to find mothers who are breastfeeding who don’t mind being starred at or being asked a hundred-million questions.

It is your (and your child’s) natural birthright! Your breasts have an evolutionary purpose! Fulfill it! (pun intended…they get REAL FULL!)

if you dont know, go ask a polar bear.

Recently, I was standing with two friends who were talking to a person whom I didn’t know. They were all slightly overweight (one more “slightly” than the others). They began talking about their intense desire to loose weight. “Oh I want it gone!” “I want to be able to feel comfortable this summer!” “I know we can do it!” (They were excited, and I was excited for them!)
Then one of them asked the other two: “So, have you heard of any new diets lately? One that would WORK, I mean?” and she rolled her eyes and laughed.
Here’s where I (a small, and in shape person) just HAD to poke my head in (because, well, I have some strong feelings towards the whole “diet” trend. First of all: eating is a diet, every time you eat anything, you are dieting. There’s no NEW diet, it’s just changing the way you eat. And some diets are ridiculous! And some are very unhealthy! And all diet needs exercise to accompany it, to maintain a healthy body size!) So, I, hesitantly, piped up and said: Well it’s all in what you eat and how much you exercise. You don’t need a "new diet" to eat healthy and be active, (no, i wasn't saying anything about how i feel about diets here, I choose my battles!) and eating a lot of nuts is very important, too! *insert supportive smile here*.
They all immediately gave each other “the look”, rolled their eyes, and laughed and scoffed things like: “Oh yeah, because I’m sure YOU have an idea of what loosing weight is all about” and “Why would we take weight loss advice from someone your size!” (They really were amusing themselves at my expense.)
And I mean, of course, if you wanted to know more about being a penguin, it would make more sense to ask the polar bears that see them, rather than the penguins themselves, hey?

It really annoyed me. I even had mean thoughts like: oh well, don’t listen to me, all in shape and healthy, keep being chubby there chubs. (but I forgave myself immediately, then wished them well and sent them love, as I re-turned away from the group.)

Personally, if someone who looked like something I wanted to be, offered me advice, I'd listen, pay attention, rather than scoff at the fact they aren't where I am right now. Like if i wanted advice about becoming rich, I'm not going to talk the other poor folk who want to be rich, and ask them if they've heard of the next "get rich quick" scheme. Nope. I'm going to trust the words of the people who are rich now! Same goes for weight issues. Small people are, more than likely, doing something different than bigger people. I think we can all learn a lot from each other, if we take out any unfavorable emotion and resentments.

I dont want to end on the word "resentments", it's too negative, so I'm going to end on something happier, like, "rainbows".

i know for sure ppl can change...

im sitting here dipping spinach leaves in a tasty dressing and eating it with my 2 year old.
mmm we love this snack!
if someone had said to me 10 yrs ago that id be doing this right now, id think they were nuts!
back then, it was chips n dip, and candy and chocolate, and probably a smoke and a pepsi.
now its spinach n dip, and hummus and crackers, and nuts and a water..
times. dey sure have changed.

we are tools used by active evolution, the personal is evolutionary.

Feminism = Person-ism... it's all up to us to evolve. 


I didn't realize the feminist women I met were such a small minority (I thought I was the only one left in the world to be introduced!) I guess when you find yourself in a university type setting, in rooms full of women (and men!) all seeming to be of like mind, or wanting to be at least, it's hard to imagine the countless other women (and men) out there that have not sat in those rooms and were not introduced to such enormous revelations (some revelant, others maybe not so much... that's left to the individual really). 


I also didn't realize the term "feminism" gets such slack and resistance. That I was going to be attacked and questioned and labeled in such harsh ways as I did when I first 'came out' as a feminist. I felt love for all people, I saw such discrepancies in the way men and women are and treat each other and react to one another. I saw the good, the bad, the WTF? And i got a bit of slack when I would talk about it (especially in front of drunk men! WHOA do some of them NOT wana hear anything about feminist views!)


Since taking a break from university it became more evidant to me that not all women (and men!) think alike about things concerning women and women's issues. Some women dont think AT ALL about things concerning women, especially in a historic or societal sense. And some even think there's nothing to think about "anymore", that women and men are completely equal which means there's nothing left to "feminism" (there's so much wrong with that, that I cant even get into it right now!) 


The most memorable quote and standpoint I recall from those courses concerning women is: the personal is political. (and this to me, is about women AND men, not just women!)


I try to take that approach with everyone I meet now. Each personal story and circumstance is very much polticial in nautre, meaning it possesses vital public concern. 


How we personally react to ourselves and each other are roots of where women (and men!) have grown in the world, and can be used to predict where women (and men!) are headed, therefore they can be altered and replanted and used to grow us into being where we want to be... living up to our potential by creating it in deeper ways, as well as evolving society/humanity as a whole.


It is up to us personally to evolve. To evolve all women and all men into the next phase of human consciousness. We all have to work on it (or if not 'all', at least more of us have to). 


Work on not being unconsciously, mindlessly driven by our subconscious, other people, the media, fear, illness, anything that isn't our truth. 


We must learn about things that please us, interests us and is somehow involved with others. Take ourselves seriously. Respect ourselves and other people. Eat healthy and more and more sustainable (this is a process!) We must be kind to ourselves. Make progress in the everyday things- and not hold things against ourselves when we slip up (letting go and forgiving asap). We must hold great hope for the future. Believe we can make a difference-and then start making it, one step at a time. Live in a limitless mindset, while respecting the environment. Treat everyone as our best friends. Trust time and what it has in store for us. Know that things are where they should be and we are on your way to pure joy. We must connect with each other more and more, in deeper ways. And we must love all children as the wonderful gifts of human potential they are (even when they stress us out! ;)  


Remember: we are tools used by active evolution, what we think and do is important to the human condition. We play a larger role, individually, than we might think we do. We are essential. 

Start now by smiling at something you love about yourself. 


:)